"Everything is fine"

I believe that church is a place full of such fakeness.  Nobody wants to be that one LDS family who is struggling and doesn't fit in.  Nobody wants to say that their kids are struggling.  Because nobody wants to break that sense that everything is "fine".  Because if don't  we admit that we aren't happy in our marriage or we are disappointed in the gender of our baby.  Or that we are six figures in debt.  Or that we are suffering from infertility.  We just  can continue to be 'fine" 

When we start being vulnerable and start saying that we aren't fine then we open ourselves up to people judging us.  But we also open ourselves up to other people offering support and saying.  "Hey I got you girl"  Sometimes life is tough but the people around us are tougher.  If we pick those people who are strong.  However, I think we need to be there on the other side and be strong when others are weak. 

This isn't just in the LDS church I think it is in most organized religions and families as well.  Because who wants to be the one siblings who is struggling when everybody else seems to have it so much together.  Although we all know that we are all struggling on some level nobody wants to be the one to make it real.  So we share little stories about the kids and think that in some way we were "real".  While we weren't lying we weren't owning our truth either.