The Six of Us

What do you like to do to celebrate an accomplishment? Eat out.  Really it is the best way. 

What's the best purchase you ever made? Our van.  We bought it almost eight years ago.  It had 50k miles on it.  Now it has 185k miles.  No major issues and a only a handful of small ones.  I found it and negoitated the price and bought it with no help with my husband.  Because I am cool.  :) 

If you're celebrating Thanksgiving today (or even if you're not!), tell us about the best cook in your family. Hands down my Brother in Law.  He is great.  He doesn't cook as much as he used to but he can look at just a few things and throw something great together.  He has taken over cooking Thanksgiving Dinners and we appreciate his effort.    He doesn't seem to cook as much as he used to maybe because he is now offically apart of the family. 

Do you think it's better to be a recognized expert for one thing, or known to be really good at lots of things? Good at several.  I don't think we were put on the earth to do just one great thing.  I think we were put her to do many good things.  We all have many talents some are more noticable then others but we can all do lots of good things.  If we master one thing then we should move on to something else to get better at. 

Who is an expert you admire and why? There are so many people who are experts in different things that admire.  I admire people who are organized.  People who can keep a clean house.  I admire people who are calm and don't get easily frustrated. 

I was feeling guilty about something that happened.  I got some good advice and pretty much I have decided that I am done feeling bad and guilty. The advice several people gave is you are playing a game you can't win. Stop playing.   I wanted to win I really did.  I had no idea what the rules were and I thought I had them figured out and thought I was winning but then it was made clear I was not. It wasn't game to me it was my life,  I lost a few times.  I lost big,  But I thought I could keep trying and that after a while those loses wouldn't matter because I was getting better at the game. Then I got some information regarding something and then it hit me...I was putting more time and energy into the game then anybody else.  Nobody else cared about me winning and I think some people wanted me to lose.  So I am done,  done playing done feeling like it wasn't good enough, like my best wasn't enough.  I gave my all.  I gave my all even when I didn't want to. 

A few weeks ago Lee text me this story.  One evening, an elderly cherokee brave told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. he said "my son, the battle is between two 'wolves' inside us all. one is evil. it is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. the other is good. it is joy, peace love, hope serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith." the grandson though about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "which wolf wins?..." the old cherokee simply replied, "the one that you feed"  One I have heard 100 times but one that I needed at that moment although I didn't know it.  There have been several situations that have happened these past few weeks and I keep thinking of that story and I have to remind myself which wolf I am feeding. There

What do you do better than anyone else? Be my kids mom.  I do it the best.  Although people like to give their opinions.  I know what my kids need and I know what makes them tick and I can parent them better then anybody.

What do you hope happens by the end of this year? A few things: 1) I hope we can get the garage cleaned out 2) I hope we can come up with a good working budget 3) I hope I can work a few shifts at my new job 4) I hope we can make a trip to Utah to see the lights.  5) I hope Luke stops crying every night when he goes to bed 6) I hope we can rid of enough books to clean off a bookcase.  7) I hope there is world peace. 

Where would you want to retire if money wasn't an issue? Whereever my kids and grandkids are.  End of story.  I see the relationship that my kids have with my parents and it is amazing.  Even if I can't live where they all live I would like to be that grandparent who comes to events such as recitals and such.  My mom told me that when they had considered living in the cabin full time they had decided they would be in Boise about twice a month so they could come to grandkid events.  That is what I want to be able to do.  Since money is no issue then I can do that.  :)

What do you hope people remember about you after you're gone? I hope that people remember that I am generous.  It is one thing that I grew up.  My parents were so generous when I was growing up.  I have tried to pass that on to my kids but it seems that they haven't quite grasp it.  Well some have better then others.  I think giving service in the community is so great.  It is a great way to meet different types of people and to step out of our comfort zone and do good for others. 

What is one place you need to see to feel like your life is complete? There are two one is Ireland.  I want to go see where my family came from.  I want to see the green landscape and the pubs.  My father always wanted to go and never did.  My mother went six months after he passed and said that she could feel him there.  There other place is I would love to go to Notre Dame.  To stand on the football feild.  To walk around the campus. 

Pretending you have the expertise to make the product a reality, what do you wish you could invent? Soemthing that will move the clothes from the washer to the dryer and then fold them.  That would be just great.  Or somethng that will wash dishes from the sink without having to put them in the dishwasher.

Describe your ideal day off, What would do with your time? I have two ideal days off... First one.   I would wake up in a hotel somewhere in Downtown Boise or Downtown Salt Lake.  I would enjoy breakfast that I didn't have to cook.  I would work out or go for  a run and then spend the day shopping and wandering through downtown going into old buildings and people watching.  I would enjoy lunch at a local place and dinner at another local place.  The second would be a family day.  We would go hikiing and hang out at the lake and have a lunch in the park or the beach and there would be laughter and goofiness and life would be good.  There would be no fighting and no place we have to be. 

If you had a personal assistant who would do your most dreaded tasks, which itemts from your to-do-list would you assign out? There are several... 1)  Maybe they could a budget and pay our bills and just give me an allowence to spend.  2) They would deal witht he insurance diaster from Luke's accident.  3) Oil Changes 4) Kid drop off for dance and soccer.  I like doing the pick up so I can hear about what happened.  5) Clean baseboards and doors. I am sure there are several more that I can't think of at this time. 

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU FIXED OR BUILT? The last thing I fixed was....Ummmmm.....There must be something right???? I am not one to build something.  My latest project was getting rid of four trash bags full of stuff to good will.  And another bag to my sister.  Five in total.   So I am fixing my house....Decluttering....Cleaning out stuff.  I have another project that I am going to start this week that I am super excited about. 

WHAT IS THE HARDEST PART OF A BIG PROJECT: GETTING THE ENERGY TO BEGIN, FINDING THE TIME TO WORK ON IT, OR FEELING DOWN IT IS OVER? Is all of the above an answer???? For me it really starts with getting the energy to begin.  I stress too much that I won't do it correctly so I put it off.   The anxiety of doing things just the right way is overwhelming to be and often paralyzing.  If things become too diffcult then I don't want to do them any more.  So then sometimes I have to force myself to finish a project. Or sometimes the project doesn't get done because I feel as though I waited too long and then I feel dumb finishing it. I don't really have a let down that it is over.  It is more of a "Yea look what I did" and then I want to move on to something bigger. 

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU DO EVER SINGLE DAY (I MEAN AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON)?  WHEN DID THAT STEP IN YOUR ROUTINE BEGIN? Uggg.... This is such a tricky question because there are so many things I want to do first thing in the morning.  Or so many things I should do first thing in the morning.  Let's start with the ideal... Ideally I would get out of bed and immediately say my prayers and then read some motiavational thing for a few moments before working out for 30 minutes and then wake up the kids.  Then I would shower and be all ready to start my day.  However...On school days it is much more choatic and the first thing I do is wake up the older kids and hope the little boys don't get woken up in the process.  Sometimes they do and sometimes the kids don't make the bus so I have to take all of the kids to the school.  And that is fine and it doesn't bother me as much as it bothers Lee.  I think this question will be my motivation for getting up t

What was your biggest fear as a child?  Do you still have it today?  If it went away, when did your feelings change? My biggest fear as a child is the fear of being accepted.  I always feared I would say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing and people would not accept me.  I spent alot of time not doing what I wanted to do because of this.  I still struggle with this as an adult/  However, especially this last year I realized I am who I am and I need to be true to myself.  This year there have been relationships that have been severely damaged because I wasn't true to myself for all too long and then when I was authentic the person didn't accept me for who I am.   I take partial responsibilty for not being real but it was hard when they didn't want to accept me for me.  I think for me this is a  life long process.  To continue to be real if people don't want to be friends with me because of that then that is on them not me. 

I don't get it at all.  Maybe I need time to process is it all.  The church came out with two statements today.  One is that being a gay marriage is grounds for being excommunicated for apostcy.  The other is minor children of gay parents can not be blessed or baptized.  The first statement I kind of get.  But if you are going to ex for gay marriage why not having children out of wedlock and a million other reasons I could think of.  The second statement I do not understand at all.  Not even a little bit.  A baby can not be given a name and blessing because of who the parents are nor can they be baptized.  But straight people who are living together can have their child blessed.  If you have child with your boyfriend of the month who is long gone before the baby is born then that child can be blessed and baptized.  If your parents are in prison for murder then  you can be blessed and baptized but not if you have gay parents. 

What is the most important lesson you learned as a child, and who taught it to you? There are two improtant lessons that I was taught both by my parents.  First was the importance of hard work.  Nothing is for free and if you want it you have to work for it.  We worked hard growing up as did my parents.  There was plenty of play time as well though.  The second lesson I learned was the value of education.  My parents encouraged me to get a college degree and were my biggest supporters when I decided to go back to graduate school. 

When you were a kid, did you want to have the same job or a different job than your parents when you grew up? Growing up my father was an auditor who traveled quite a bit. My mother was a stay at home mom with side jobs here and there until I was in sixth grade and then she had a part time job with the school which several years later was a full time job.  I always knew I would work outside the home at least part time.  I knew I would never want to stay home full time.  So in tthat sense I was more like my mom's "job" however I was never thrilled about being a teacher.  I was planning on being a high school counselor for a while but decided that counseling degree would not give me the same opportunities as a social worker.  I was right.  But I did know I wanted to be home most the time with my kids and be able to be on the PTO board and be a dance and soccer mom.  I feel like we have a good balance although I am hoping in the next year or two I can work less as my ch

What did you think was the coolest job in the world when you were younger? Do you still feel that way now? I always thought being a Broadway dancer would be so cool.  But my dancing career ended in a serious car accident when I was a junior in high school.  I still think that would be so cool.  The lights being on stage.  I know that it isn't all glamorous and that it is a very demanding job but I still thinking it would be fun. e It is now my daughter's dream to be a Rockette.  Even if she never achieves that dream I would love to take her NYC one day to see them preform. 

What was the one toy that a friend had that you wished you had when you were little? I don't think there was ever one toy that a friend had that I really wanted.  My friend had a dog and I always wanted one of those.  Her mom also made iced tea in the summer which was forbidden at our home and had Coke and Oreos something we never had at home. That same friend loved coming to our home because we had a trillion kids (or four) and there was always something going on.  My mom let us make "concoctions" in the kitchen like pebto bismal.  It was really but it was the same weird pink color.   We had Popsicle and a trampoline.  So she always thought our home was way cooler and LOUDER then her's.  r I think it is really one of those the grass is always greener even though the person with the grass that is green thinks whatever you have going on is better. 

I started a contest where you blog every week day in November and then you can be entered for prizes and such.  But really I just wanted an excuse to blog more.  I love November it is my favorite month of the year.  Beats October which used to be one of my favorite but was a struggle this year and probably will be for the the forseeable future.  One thing I have noticed that people cycle whether they know it or not.  For the clients and people I have seen it happens yearly.  There is one or two months out of the year that are harder then most.  We had a client who had horrible crappy stuff happen to her in February and every year she would have a slight break down not major but noticeable  For some people it is more noticeable then others.  But I think for most people it happens. As soon as my BFF texts back I will book my ticket for Phoenix.  So happy.  One of these days I wills tay longer then 48 hours and visit family there.  But this is not that trip.  I am renting a car which