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A Day Of....

I get the impression that nobody deals well when I make comments such as "when I was pregnant last time".  My friends and co-workers seem to deal with it much better then family which is odd.  

Today is A Day of Remembrance for Infant Loss and Miscarriages.  I really wish this topic was talked about more.  I wish people would be more open to discussing this.  I wish this wasn't something that was discussed in hushed voices behind closed doors.  

I think this is something that nobody has to deal with until they are going through it.  The first time it happened to me I felt so alone and some of that has to do with nobody knowing how to deal with it.  So they didn't say anything.  

I found my own online support groups and found support online when I wasn't getting any in my real life.  The third time it happened I was more prepared and I had an amazing support group.  My friends cried with me.  Some people ignored me and it was a good wake up call on who I could count on and who I could not.  


It is part of the reason we have decided that more children are not in our future because emotionally a fourth miscarriage would devastate me.  The recovery time emotionally and physically is too much to place on my family at this time.  There are people who tell us that two children is not enough and some how we are not being righteous.  Once again others do not get to tell me how many children we have.   This is something that we discuss and pray about.  If at sometime in the future we feel differently then we will go from there. 



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