As soon as I am done with school I am going to make a decision that will change my life. It will seriously change everything about my life. But I keep having second thoughts about leaving. What will it do to the kids? To Lee? Does it really matter as long as I am doing what is best for me? If it is best for me then I think I will do it. Doing what is best for me is really best for the whole family. I am struggling with what to do. I am sure it will come to me once my mind is clearer. I know some people will be supportive yet there will be those who will judge and think I should stay. After all stability is so important. I really wish things would have turned out differently but they didn't.
This has been a tough week. I worked some extra hours which were only five hour shifts but were still were time away from the kids. Kids are at their breaking point and wether or not they know it they need schedules and some stablness. School starts Tuesday and comments about how people hope my kids dont kill their teachers with COVID is neither helpful or accurate. Plus we had a budget meeting after months of no meetings. In which we found out that we had once again over spent in August. Which could have been stopped if we would have known earlier in the month. I sent $1500 to student loans. Andrew turned eight yesterday and I am so thankful for him. He is become such a deep thinker and asks these amazing questions that I don't always have the answers to. The meds have helped slow him down but he is still crazy Andrew. We upped the medications and it was like he was on speed. He couldn't sleep and was kind of zombie like. Then there has been a few moments wher...
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