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Showing posts from February, 2019

"Everything is fine"

I believe that church is a place full of such fakeness.  Nobody wants to be that one LDS family who is struggling and doesn't fit in.  Nobody wants to say that their kids are struggling.  Because nobody wants to break that sense that everything is "fine".  Because if don't  we admit that we aren't happy in our marriage or we are disappointed in the gender of our baby.  Or that we are six figures in debt.  Or that we are suffering from infertility.  We just  can continue to be 'fine"  When we start being vulnerable and start saying that we aren't fine then we open ourselves up to people judging us.  But we also open ourselves up to other people offering support and saying.  "Hey I got you girl"  Sometimes life is tough but the people around us are tougher.  If we pick those people who are strong.  However, I think we need to be there on the other side and be strong when others are weak.  This is...

Why?

Right before family reunion last year I had this dream.  In the dream I walked in to a room where several adults were sitting discussing Victoria’s decisions to wear talk tops.  In the dream I lost my cool.  Victoria told me this week that she had walked into a room  during reunion where several adults were discussing her dyed hair and said it was against church teachings.  She said she didn’t mention it at the time because she knew I would be upset.    I am beyond upset.  I don’t understand why adults feel the need to criticize a 12 year old girl.  Who gets good grades in honor classes who loves dreaming big.  Who serves in class presidency and is working hard to get her young women’s in excellence.  Who is an amazing big sister.  Who is compassionate and is learning to speak up for the wrong in the world.  A girl who can see both sides of an argument and come to her own conclusion.  Why would anybody judge this girl...

Sickness, company and chaos

Two weeks ago my in-laws came into town for Jake's birthday and ordination . It was a great weekend.  Although I worked half of it.  Sunday my mom came over for Jakes birthday celebration and we had good food and a good time.   But then Andrew got sick on Sunday.  And likely made my mother in law sick as well as my mom.  Sunday was rough.  Andrew was up all night with fever induced hallucinations.  At one point he shut himself in the bathroom and refused to come out until I assured him all the bad guys were gone.  My mother in law was up all night coughing and between the coughing and hallucinations it was one of the longest scariest nights of my life.  Andrew's fever wouldn't break.  In the morning he seemed better however, Monday night he had one more episode of the hallucinations.  Monday my mother in law was super sick and slept most the day on our couch.  Despite my several offers to drive her to McCall she decline....