The Six of Us

What a trip!  Ten days of friends, clay babies, rose gardens and the zoo.  Of course there was packing in there and Lee and I went to a graduation.  Busy busy summer and we are just getting started.  So glad I am home with the kids and able to take them places.  I almost cried at the zoo because Lee wasn't there but I love that we could face time him and show him what we were up to.  The little boys for the most part did very well.  We got home this morning at one in the morning.  And it was three before Luke settled down and went to sleep.  I applied for two more jobs and I want to apply for one more.  Things are falling into place and there are several PRN/flex jobs as well as one part time one.  I just have to find the perfect one for us. Anyway things are going well.  Day camp was Tuesday and Jake had fun.   Lee had a friend staying the weekend with us. Busy busy!!  So glad we decided on no sports this summer....

I should be sleeping.  Not sure why I am not.  I just spent hours looking at hotels for my trip.  Still not sure I am going.  Lee thinks I should.  Lots of nice hotels with expensive price tags.  hotels are so pricy and I am not sure why. Probably because they can be. I could probably get away with only one night but I think I am probably going to book 3.  Two nights in Portland and one in Seattle.    I told Lee I was going to take the life insurance money and use it for the trip.  He said it had to be used on something fun.  Okay then I won't take it.  Lee at this point has talked me out of renting a car.  If it was just for a week I would do it but the cost for the days I am going to be gone is for two weeks.  I need to make this trip not about me but about my sister in law and my BFF.  I hate she is moving.  I was telling somebody that I did stuff to annoy people and she said that wasn't helpful....

I am feeling left out of so many things these days.  But more then that I am feeling betrayal. I feel like I keep reaching out to people but I don't get anything in return.  It is hard to explain.  And even harder because I don't want everybody to know.  But it has been a tough transition.  But one I feel like I have to go through alone.  Lee is scheduled for surgery on Wednesday and I am scared to death about it.  I was going to leave Friday for Washington but now I just don't know.  Lee still wants me to go.  But I am think that I will wait until Saturday and possibly skip my sister in law's dinner.  It doesn't sound super kid friendly and I would be with all the kids after being in the car for several hours. I am considering getting a hotel in Seattle Saturday night.  One with a pool and we can order pizza and the kids would have a blast.  Although I may miss the weekend all together and not go up until Monday.  My bi...