The Six of Us

I feel as though I keep failing.  I went to register Victoria for her dance classes.  One class is "waited listed" and with Victoria there are six dancers on the list.  I was able to take the last spot in her ballet class.  I am half hoping they are able to get her into the jazz class and half hoping they won't.  She is really a natural ballerina.  And she is done with it most likely done with it after this year.  She really wanted to run cross county but that wasn't an option due to the timing of the practices.  However, she does get to do Girls on the Run again so she is happy about that. She is going to have Lee run the 5k with her.  Dance started tonight.  I received an email from the business manger at the studio.  They are doing some rearranging and so Victoria will likely get the class she wants at the time we want.  :)  I hope.  Cross Country started last week and Jake seems to like it.  He only went ...

Refi Funded on the 3rd.  We are still waiting for a few bills to be paid but half of them have.  Lee's car and our second have been paid. Still waiting for our three credit cards to be paid.  So I just did our budget based our the new bills.   I see a light at the end of the tunnel.  I think that we can really have the credit cards all paid off in 10-12 months.  If I work about 30 hours a pay check then everything will be just fine.  More then that the house and things I need to take care of falls apart less then we can still pay the bills but we don't get ahead as much as I want. I am excited and scared all at the same thing. I wrote this last night.  Today my supervisor emailed me and asked if I would be willing to pick up an 8 hour shift every other Saturday.  I have done that shift before.  I don't love it.   New schedules come out this week.  So we will see how the next few months go.  Nothing is forever....

Several things have been going on 1) Victoria has decided to do dance for another year.  Although I have another week before I need to register her and I am looking for other options. 2) Jake will be doing cross county starting the 15th 3) My review was done today for work.  Pretty much my boss said I was fabulous and the nurses enjoy working with me. 4) Refi is done and will fund tomorrow. Which means we will be able to take the remaining credit cards and transfer them into one bill.  Lee's car and several other debts will be paid off. 5)  The older kids are leaving us for eight days.  Not sure how I feel about it.  I am going to really miss them. 6) Budget is done and we will start using it the 15th.  It will be tight for several reasons.  a) Lee wants to go to Oceanside next summer b) I want the debt paid off quickly 7)  I am working ten extra days in October and September.  The money will be nice I figure it will be ...

The bank just change the amount at closing by $2200.  I am just so ready to be done.  Thankful I am married to an accountant who was able to go through the closing paperwork and notice some things.  When the underwriter tried to explain it to us I felt like she was talking double talk and she was blaming us.  So here I sit at work while I would rather be home putting kids to bed and then discussion options.  We will probably still sign on Friday (or Lee will) I am not going to be on the loan. Just trying to breathe and make it through until the next crisis. 

My 20 year class reunion was this weekend.  I wish I would have gone to the formal dinner but I didn't.  I was pondering what I have done with my life and of course came up with all the negative stuff.  Like our huge amount of debt, our lack of traveling, and our too small house and our 20 year old van and the 30 pounds I still have to lose. But there is lots of positives.  I have four fabulous kids and I have been married 16 years to my first husband.  We managed to keep our home for the past 13 years.  I earned my master's degree which puts me in the minority (education wise) of people.   I enjoy my job and I feel blessed I was able to find a job that is part time and doesn't require daycare for the most part.    I don't have regrets.  I have things I wish would have gone differently but I don't have regrets so to speak.  I wonder where the next 20 years will take us.  We will be empty nesters.  We w...

When I was cleaning today I stumbled on to my dad's bucket list.  He had clearly written after he had gotten sick as his hand writing was super shaky.  What was on the bucket list?   Sell the car, finish the bathroom, complete the taxes  etc.... I wasn't surprised that is what Dad wrote.  He got through the first page of two pages in a small note book. The end was so hard on my Dad.  But he tried to make things as easy on my mom as possible. He got half there.  Well more then that.  Because he worked so hard and was so smart with money for so many years he was able to leave my mom financial comfortable. For that I am grateful. I stsrted this post a few months ago when we were in the middle of packing and cleaning.  Today we closed the doors and said good bye to the house.  Now it belongs to somebody else.  Somebody who is very excited about it.  Their dream come true.  I am glad my mom is moving on to a...

  I had a situation at work where I was fighting against the system.  In the end it appears I lost.  There was nothing more I could do for this patient.  But maybe something will change for another patient.  so maybe I didn't lose after all.  But maybe I should have keep fighting against injustice.  After all that is in my oath.  Some times the "system" seems bigger then we are and there is no use trying to change it.  Whether it is church or work place or the kids' school.  But sometimes it takes just one person to change it.  Sometimes it is that one person who is able to break down the walls that have been standing for a while, despite the fact that nobody else could.  The last few days have been overwhelming.  I am ready to file bankruptcy run off to the Bahamas and call it day. But I would probably miss Lee and the  kids after a few hours.  But instead I will move through it.  I will be...