People love to ask if we are excited about another baby and if we are excited we are having a boy. Ummmm....Yes is the most political correct answer. Although truthfully we are not over the moon excited, I am still a little bitter that four years to the month that we decided we wanted a third baby we are finally getting him. I am still holding my breath that this pregnancy will go full term. And well Lee doesn't get excited until after the baby is born. He never has. And that is fine. He doesn't need to.
I sometimes wonder where to draw the line in this whole blogging thing. I could make us look like the "perfect" family or I could deal with all of our disappointment and make everybody think that we quite possible have the worse life ever. Or maybe there is a middle ground somewhere that I have yet to find in this blog. Today was a rough day. Don't get me wrong I am so excited that everybody around me is having babies. But for some reason today I was caught up in the losses all over again. I am wondering when it stops. Maybe it never does. Maybe it will be a life time of wondering what if I would have gone full term. Several people have asked when (or if) we are going to have another baby. I am not sure. Sometimes that answer is yes and sometimes it is no. But one thing is for certain it isn't right now. Really I don't need to have a ton of kids to fill some void. I love my two kids and if that is all ...
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