Church was good today although I almost didn't go. We have a new teacher in Sunday School. She just got back from her mission. It was a good lesson for sure. The part I got out of it was enduring your trials and enduring them well. Then we heading into the third hour. I wish people would not comment on things they know nothing about. I wish people would not say that things are church doctrine when they are in fact not. Somebody made a statement and they could not back it up. Just focus on the lesson. It was way emotional of a thing for me and I almost walked out. Once you start just making random statements that are not doctrine the spirit leaves and people get way too riled up.
I sometimes wonder where to draw the line in this whole blogging thing. I could make us look like the "perfect" family or I could deal with all of our disappointment and make everybody think that we quite possible have the worse life ever. Or maybe there is a middle ground somewhere that I have yet to find in this blog. Today was a rough day. Don't get me wrong I am so excited that everybody around me is having babies. But for some reason today I was caught up in the losses all over again. I am wondering when it stops. Maybe it never does. Maybe it will be a life time of wondering what if I would have gone full term. Several people have asked when (or if) we are going to have another baby. I am not sure. Sometimes that answer is yes and sometimes it is no. But one thing is for certain it isn't right now. Really I don't need to have a ton of kids to fill some void. I love my two kids and if that is all ...
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